Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Top 16 Greatest Beards Of All Time

In honor of the Stanley Cup playoffs, the NCV crew has decided to countdown the 16 (HOW MANY WINS IT TAKES TO LIFT THE STANLEY CUP) best beards of all time. At the end of this blog the people are also going to vote for Shanezoola's playoff beard to either keep it or shave it. As of right now it is 10-9 (KEEP IT).

16. Phil Margera
Every part of Bam's dad is not solid, except his beard. He has kept that thing rocksteady for a long time.



15. Jerry Garcia
This man's beard is solid! Plus making him a musician and one of the greatest rock and rollers of all time added to his lore and put him on this list.



14. Abraham Lincoln
He is probably the most recognizable president in history with his beard. Put a photo of him next to a bunch of other presidents and people will easily recognize Honest Abe.



13. Grizzly Adams
Definition of a rugged man. That is what beards are all about. He is what an American man is all about!



12. Geico Cavemen
For hilarity, these guys are one of a kind. Like Abe, there are also very recognizable in our society. Their commercials are sheer genious!



11. Bob Ross
Any man who paints scenic portraits with a beard like his is definitely on acid. How many freakin' mountains do you have to paint Bob? How many trees? Knowing him he probably smoked most of them. SOLID BEARD THO!



10. Baron Davis
Baron Davis made his beard famous during the 2007 NBA Playoffs against Dallas. The beard was thick and even on all cylinders. It was the quintessential playoff beard!



9. ZZ Top
How can these guys not make the list. Their beards have probably been consistently famous for decades now and even our new generation of people still recognize who they are.



8. Michael Gross
Solid 70's and 80's beard. You have to take a second and watch an episode of Family Ties and appreciate the facial hair of Michael J. Fox's dad. It is just splendid everywhere!



7. Bob Vila
Screw Tim Taylor, Bob Vila is Home Improvement. Solid Handyman. Even better beard.



6. Barry White
Underrated beard. This man not only dominates baby makin' music but his facial hair shits on a lot of people. If there is a quality of Barry White you don't like, you just need to blow your head off cause you are definitely out of your mind!



5. Richard Karn
While Tim Taylor fucks everything up in its path, Al Borland holds Tool Time together. If I was him I would take off my flannel shirt and choke Tim Allen to death with him and before death make Tim apologize to his beard for ever causing him any trouble.



4. Kenny Rogers
The Gambler has to make the list. He's one of those unique White Beards who has consistently been around for almost 4-5 decades. Unforgettable beard!



3. Santa Claus
This man has not shaved his face in years cause he is worried about getting your damn presents you ungrateful bastards! The least we can do is thank him and his everywhere facial hair for providing us with everlasting Christmas cheer.



2. Chuck Norris
Do you know Chuck Norris' tears can cure AIDS? The only bad thing is that no one has ever seen Chuck Norris cry.



1. Jesus Christ
The Messiah OWNS this list. He kept his facial hair solid throughout time and will still dominate it today and forever. Let's see you not agree here.



Before we end it, once again the blog is acknowledging Shanezoola's beard and vote now whether you want the beard to stay or go. Voting ends Thursday night.